It Takes Two ~ A poem & extract from “The Defeatist”

It Takes Two

Jude, please dry your tears and take my hand

Even though neither of us understands

What we’re doing or where we are

We can’t stop now, we’ve gotten this far

Jude get to your feet, you can’t give in

Though your heart is breaking and you’ve grown thin

Stop blaming yourself, for it wasn’t just you:

Who broke your relationship, it takes two.

An extract from my novel – The Defeatist- Chapter 22 :

The Defeatist actual kindle image

“I behaved like a hormonal teenager!”
“That’s probably because your moods were up and down like a yo-yo!”
“No, I’m serious.”
“I was quite mean to Joe.” I whisper.
“He got really aggressive towards you; you nearly landed yourself with a head injury because of him.”
“I provoked him.”
“You know what, for now, I’m kind of glad that I was single: my life was complicated enough without fighting with a partner 24/7.”
“We did not fight 24/7! There were great times too! Joe was a good man, it was my fault. Like I said, I knew something was wrong with my body, I freaked. I should have gone to the doctors sooner; it would have at least stopped us from splitting up.”
“Who left who?”
“He left me. I deserved everything I got that day. Jeez, for the last month of my life I lived a lonely, miserable existence. I didn’t see anyone apart from my Mum. That was the final time that-that I saw her. She didn’t know the full extent, but I did. Mum knew something was wrong though, by the way I hugged her before I left.”
“It broke her heart.”
I frown, but don’t say anything. I have shouted and snapped at Tiffany enough.

My novel, “The Defeatist” is just £1 on Amazon :

(USA link)

(UK link)

~I’m currently looking for people who’d be willing to review “The Defeatist” on Amazon. If you’re interested, please tweet me at @SE_BownsFiction

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015


No Longer There

Please whisper like you never have, and tell me that you care

Don’t forget my fragile face, just because I’m no longer there

Try to remember the positive times, and the joyful days we had

Dwell on the good moments; wash your hands of the bad

Neither of us was perfect, I got snappy and you were cruel:

But I accepted it anyway, it turns out that I was a fool

I hurt you Joe, concealed the truth, I lied to your face

But then you ditched me anyway. You put me in my place.

Take a moment and remember me Joe, you must still care

Just because I’m no longer visible, doesn’t mean I’m not there.

“The Defeatist” an extract from chapter 14

He sits bolt upright in the bed, throwing the covers off both of us.
“I’m sleeping in the spare room, keep your stupid bed. You know Jude, since you haven’t been feeling right, you’ve done nothing but mope and think about yourself. Where do I come into this equation? I am not looking after you!”
“I didn’t ask you to.”
“You need me; you couldn’t even pick yourself off the floor!”
“No I don’t.”
Jeez! Why did I say that? It was unbelievably stupid. If something is going to make him fly off the handle it will be that.
I cannot stand this any longer. Our ugly relationship is breaking me.

My novel, “The Defeatist” is just £1 on Amazon :

(USA link)

(UK link)

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015

Where Do I Go?

Which way do I turn, Granddad? Where have you gone?

I can’t go this alone; I’ve no strength to carry on

I’m hopeless, I’m afraid and don’t know where I’m supposed to be

What a critical mess I’m in, oh life, what have you done to me?

Who the hell are you, and why are you dressed that way?

Don’t you have somewhere to be, or something more to say?

You look like a hippy; I bet you have a crack pipe too

Perhaps I shouldn’t have said that. Can I sit with you?

No wait, did I offend you? I’m a stupid guy, I know

I wouldn’t blame you if you wanted to abandon me and go.

I don’t know what comes next as we embark on this endeavour.

How did you get here? Why are we trapped in this place together?

My novel, “The Defeatist” is just £1 on Amazon :

(USA link)

(UK link)

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015


Jude Reed :

I stand alone in the darkness; happen to glance over my shoulder

My body is slumped and lifeless, as my limbs grow colder

Do you ever sit and wonder what life could have been?

Am I trapped in a nightmare, or some pre-proposed dream?

Was I really a terrible person, how far did I fall;

To want to leave so badly, and escape from it all?

Who was Jude really, was he an imagined, false face?

The man inside him died, leaving a coward in his place

Why am I caught in limbo? And how hard can it be;

To escape from fate’s grasp when it has control of me.

The Defeatist is just £1 on Amazon :

(USA link)

(UK link)

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015

The Defeatist and the struggle of being a writer.

The Defeatist actual kindle image

I started writing my latest novel “The Defeatist” in November 2014, when I had a brainwave and had to get it down on paper. The Defeatist tells the story 30-year-old Jude Reed, who reached breaking point and could see no way out. Jude takes the reader on an emotional ride through the conflicting complexities of love, guilt, redemption, and the vagaries of life.

“Sometimes you don’t realise the mess you’ve made until you hit rock bottom. My life is a car crash, and the only person I can blame is myself. I was the reason that my parents broke up, and I ruined my own chances of happiness. I’m not proud of what I’ve done, and worst of all I hate the person I’ve become. My name is Jude Reed, and when I arrived, I was helpless and alone.
Then I met Tiffany and everything changed.”

~Jude Reed

-As a writer/blogger you know that writing is a process of love. I’d really appreciate your feedback so get your FREE copy of the book I put blood, sweat and tears into!

British readers get your copy here :

USA Readers, click here :

The Defeatist is FREE today. (12/6/15)

Don’t miss out on this free promotion!

Jude Reed was in a horrible situation. Trapped in a broken relationship and having to watch his own parent’s marriage crumble, he felt there was no way to turn :

~An extract from chapter 1 : 

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, do you?”


“Well, let’s be honest, your side of the family were never all that fond of me, were they?”

“Please stop making excuses; they thought nothing of the sort! Simon, say you’ll be there!”

This is painful; I cannot believe that my Mum is having to beg my Dad to come to my funeral. This is horrible. We were never that close, but I had no idea that he thought so little of me.

“I’ll think about it.”

Is that all he has to say? I can’t believe that he’s having to think about it! What a bastard, what a vile, low individual. I mean, I loathed myself and now I see why, perhaps I was too much like him? I cannot believe that I barely saw my own Mother before she died, especially when she was having to contend with my Father. God! She needed some support.

“That’s pathetic!”

“Oh Vi, that’s a bit hypocritical, don’t you think?”

“You were never there for him!”

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015

The Defeatist will be FREE on Amazon tomorrow- 12/6/15

Hello everyone- this is just a quick update to let you all know that I’m doing another free promotion day tomorrow for “The Defeatist” on Amazon TOMORROW (12/6/15) : 

If you could let people know, and help to spread the word about a bit, that would be wonderful!


The Defeatist

“Don’t bring me back, please. Stop! Where am I?  I stare at my feet, which are firmly planted on the tarmac pavement and glance over my shoulder.My body is still there, but-but I’m over here. I must have succeeded.”

~Jude Reed, “The Defeatist”

If anyone is genuinely willing to write an Amazon review for this novel, feel free to get in contact with me via WordPress, Twitter or my Facebook page and I have a PDF copy that you can have. (I’m willing to do review swaps!) 🙂

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015

The Defeatist~ A new £1 Ebook.

“Can- can I ask you something?”
“Yes of course, seeing as though I have bombarded you with questions.”
“Why us? Why do you think we’ve been put together?”
She shakes her head. “Maybe it’s because we died on the same day. We are two newbies who are still trying to find our way. We will get there, Jude. I’ll help you and you’ll help me. I promise not to be a pain in the backside any more.”

~ Jude & Tiffany- The Defeatist.

-I’m looking for people who’d be willing to read & review “The Defeatist.” If you’re interested, or would like to do a review swap, just let me know.

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015

The Defeatist ~ A new novel by Sophie Bowns.

“In truth, I was shit scared and tired of living. Some might say that I’d been putting on a brave face for too long.
~ Jude Reed, ‘The Defeatist’

-My novel, The Defeatist is available on Amazon for a small donation of £1.

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015