Pulling Through


(Tiffany & Jude)

Perhaps I’m a bit much, am I ‘in your face?’
You’re about to tell me to shut up. Yes, put me in my place
My purpose is to help you, get you out of this depression
Think of me being here as a little therapy session
We have to keep ourselves going if we want to pull through
I don’t know how I know; let’s say that I just do.

Just ignore my self-pity, I know you mean well
Do we have a purpose? I suppose only time will tell
I know you’re trying to help me out of my depression;
But I am not a patient, and this is not a therapy session
Will we reach our journey’s end? We might never pull through
You seem to have a sixth sense. You know me better than I do.

~MY NOVEL, “THE DEFEATIST” IS JUST £1 ON AMAZON :

The Defeatist actual kindle image

(USA link) http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

(UK link) http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015

Apron Strings


Screen Shot 2015-07-28 at 15.24.51

Simon Reed : 

Why were you always so timid and shy? Forever your Mother’s son

I said some shameful things, and now they can’t be undone

I wanted you to be more like me, but instead you were so like her

You were attached to your Mum’s apron strings. Her company you’d always prefer

Perhaps I was never there for you, even though you’d try too hard;

To catch my attention just for a moment, but your feelings I’d disregard

I was shocked by your sexuality; I admit that I went too far

My actions forced you out of our door, and made you who you are

Jude, you know I didn’t like him. He wasn’t good for your mental health

Joe was like a mirror image of me. He reminded me of myself.

~My novel, “The Defeatist” is just £1 on Amazon :

(USA link) http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

(UK link) http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015

Questions and Answers with Author of ‘The Defeatist’, Sophie Bowns!


Originally posted on Sarah's Bookshelf:

I thought people might be quite interested to hear how an author writes and where they get their ideas from, so I’ve asked Sophie Bowns, author of ‘the Defeatist’ to do a question and answer session with me! My last post was a review of ‘The Defeatist’, which can be viewed here! I gave the novel a 4/5 rating because I literally could not put it down, the plot was intriguing and kept my attention throughout, and the general narrative was so well thought out. Anyway, introducing….Sophie!


What made you set ‘The Defeatist’ in a limbo between life and death?

It’s something that has always fascinated me. I think ‘what happens to us after we die?’ is a question that everyone would like the answer to. I thought that setting ‘The Defeatist’ in limbo could be quite an interesting concept, as I enjoy reading novels and on-line articles about the afterlife and angels.

View original 772 more words

Review; the Defeatist, by Sophie Bowns


Originally posted on Sarah's Bookshelf:

January 2014

Somebody is literally pounding at my chest, but I’m numb. At least I think I am, because I can only see. Shit, the scene is messier than I imagined. The car is still smoking and no-one is putting it out, all their attention is focused on me. Do they want me to make it? I don’t. People’s voices are muffled and my eyes avert to the spider-webbed windscreen and the large tree branch which penetrates through my car. Smoke plumes billow from the bonnet. Did they get me out? Did they drag me from the driver’s seat before the vehicle burst into flames? If they did, I could be paralysed and wheelchair bound. Perhaps that’s why I’m numb? Oh God, my face is unrecognisable. Don’t bring me back, please. Stop! Where am I? I stare at my feet, which are firmly planted on the tarmac pavement and glance…

View original 559 more words

House Arrest- A poem & extract from my novel, “The Defeatist” (FREE today)


Download your FREE copy of  my novel, “The Defeatist”  from Amazon here:

UK www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

USA  www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

Canada www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

France http://www.amazon.fr/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

Germany http://www.amazon.de/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

Spain http://www.amazon.es/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

Italy http://www.amazon.it/Defeatist-English-Sophie-Bowns-ebook/dp/B00WEIF1ZK

Australia   http://www.amazon.com.au/Defeatist-Sophie-Bowns-ebook/dp/B00WEIF1ZK

Japan  http://www.amazon.co.jp/Defeatist-English-Sophie-Bowns-ebook/dp/B00WEIF1ZK

The Defeatist actual kindle image

House Arrest :

The ticking clock is deafening in the silence of the room

I lie along the sofa, overwhelmed by my sense of doom

I don’t know what’s happening; my legs don’t feel like my own

I am now a stranger in the place I once called my home

I’m afraid of what might be said, or what Joe’s mood will be

And when he arrives home from work, he won’t have time for me

I’ve forgotten how to sleep; he hates my restlessness at night

I’m tempted to doze in the guest room, I can’t bear another fight

I’m the one to blame, the reason our relationship is disintegrating

I still love Joe, I wouldn’t leave, even though he finds me aggravating

There’s an argument brewing, Yes, I can see it in his eyes

Still, I deserve this. I hid the truth and to his face I lied

“What the hell is up with you?” He isn’t best impressed

I sense the tight knot of anxiety, gathering in my chest

He proceeds to ask me about Christmas plans- Joe, not now!

Then states we should celebrate alone. I don’t think so somehow

“Your Mum invited us” he smirks, “But I turned her offer down.”

He’s enjoying himself, I can tell. All I can do is frown

“It’s no big deal.” He groans, but it meant so much to me

I’m a prisoner in my home; in mind, and in body.

I shiver and curl on the sofa, my arms wrapped around my chest

I daren’t leave his sight. He is keeping me under house arrest.

An extract from chapter 14 – November 2013

“Can it just be the two of us this Christmas?”
What? No! I really wanted to see my Mum on Christmas day. We haven’t discussed this at all.
“It’s just…” He continues. “Your Mum rang the home phone and asked if we wanted to come over, but I said no and that we wanted it to just be us.”
My chest aches and heart sinks. He did what?! I place my hand over my mouth.
“Shit! What?”
“Jeez, relax Jude! It’s no big deal!”
“It is to me!”
“So you’d rather have Christmas with your Mum? You haven’t changed a bit.”
“Oh look, what gave you the right to assume that you can just answer for me? You know that I always spend Christmas evening at my Mum’s!”
“Yes, I heard you the first time.”
“Oh God! I need to call her back, if you don’t want to be there then you just make your own plans, but this means so much to me. You stopped me from going last time!”
“As if you can blame me! For once, grow up and accept that you made the mistake, not me. You’re always so quick to blame it on someone else.”
I narrow my eyes, but say nothing. Joe is really pissing me off, and if I was a violent person, I would wipe the smug expression from his face.
“What’s up, Jude?”
I say nothing. He grabs my arm, pinning me up against the wall.
“Tell me!”
“You’re being controlling again. Stop it!”
“Oh get a grip!”
“No, I mean it. If you don’t stop I..”
“You’ll what, Jude? You’re making empty threats, it’s pathetic!”
What the hell is wrong with me. My blood is boiling and I wish I was by myself when he’s here, but when we’re apart, I miss Joe more than anything! Shit, this is so messed up. I’m not myself, my hands are shaking. I need to get out.
“This is horrible.” I whisper.
“You look terrible.”
“Oh stop it!”
But it’s true, the colour has drained from my face and my limbs are so numb. I sit down before I fall.

~Last, but not least. If you liked this post, please SHARE it on your social media accounts!

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015

The ramblings of a self-published author. (Ps- my novel, “The Defeatist” is free for your kindle)


My novel, “The Defeatist” is free on Amazon Kindle today-

(Friday 24th July)

UK www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

USA  www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

The Defeatist actual kindle image

So, what is “The Defeatist” actually about?

I’d describe The Defeatist as a tale of love, loss and second chances as my protagonist; Jude Reed struggles to deal with personal situations which are both in and out of his control.
The novel itself offers a suggestion of what could happen to someone in the afterlife if they happen to get trapped in the ‘in-between.’
Jude isn’t alone for long. He meets Tiffany, a seemingly free- spirited and happy young woman and these questions come to light-

  • Who is she, and why have she and Jude been put together on this journey?
  • Why can’t Jude’s Dad accept his own son?
  • What was it that actually pushed Jude Reed over the edge and will he ever be able to make amends?

(Of course, you’ll have to read the novel, to find out.)

 

A quick thank you:

I just wanted to take a moment to thank the 11 people who have taken the time to write Amazon reviews. It really means a lot- thank you! As a writer, it’s a constant challenge. If you write yourself, I’m sure that you’re more than aware of the motivation that is required to actually sit down and write a novel.

Here are 8 tips which help me when I’m writing a novel :

  1. Use bullet pointed lists

I think the hardest thing for me and most people is actually coming up with the initial idea. Some people will plan in great depth, but I like to jot things down as I go along. For example, I’ll write a bullet pointed list of my characters and a few lines describing each one such as their age, likes and dislikes and a brief physical description.

  1. Come up with a some appropriate conflicts

Next I’ll come up with conflicts within the plot. Jude Reed, my protagonist of “The Defeatist” could be said to be his own worst enemy (rather like myself) and has to break the vicious cycle of his own self-loathing after his death. Give your main character an interesting problem.

  1. LOVE your characters.

Make sure that you either genuinely love your characters or love to hate them. There’s nothing worse than writing a book, getting about 10,000 words into it, and thinking: ‘my characters are really boring.’ Take control and sort them out!

  1. Write a story that YOU WOULD WANT TO READ.

Write in a genre that you love. The afterlife fascinates me, and I myself enjoy reading novels that flit backwards and forwards in time.

  1. Make the story believable.

There is nothing worse than reading a novel and thinking ‘that wouldn’t have happened that way.’ One of my pet hates is reading sections in novels that aren’t medically accurate. It’s strange, I know, but after doing two years of nurse training I don’t want to know that someone’s heart stopped beating and no-one attempted CPR!

  1. Write with honesty and confidence

-Don’t be obnoxious. I try to use words that people will understand without reaching for the Oxford Dictionary.

  1. REMEMBER : You are telling someone else’s story.

Keep asking yourself how your protagonist would speak and act. Make sure that you write in context. Don’t worry about your characters’ speech sounding too colloquial. At the end of the day, you want them to be believable. Make the speech in your novel chatty and natural.

  1. Lastly: don’t panic and never give up.

If you’re really struggling, leave it for a day, week, or even a month. I often find that inspiration hits me at the most random and inappropriate times- i.e. when I’m at work or when I wake up in the middle of the night.

If you enjoy The Defeatist, please leave a review!

I’m still looking for people who’d be willing to review “The Defeatist” on Amazon. If you’re interested, please tweet me at @SE_BownsFiction.

Download your FREE copy of “The Defeatist” here:

UK www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

USA  www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

Canada www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

France http://www.amazon.fr/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

Germany http://www.amazon.de/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

Spain http://www.amazon.es/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

Italy http://www.amazon.it/Defeatist-English-Sophie-Bowns-ebook/dp/B00WEIF1ZK

Australia   http://www.amazon.com.au/Defeatist-Sophie-Bowns-ebook/dp/B00WEIF1ZK

Japan  http://www.amazon.co.jp/Defeatist-English-Sophie-Bowns-ebook/dp/B00WEIF1ZK

~Last, but not least. If you liked this post, please SHARE it on your social media accounts!

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015

Back To The Start- (“The Defeatist” is free on Amazon kindle tomorrow 24/7/15)


Jude :

I feel like I’m missing an arm, a piece of myself

Why was your love for me gathering dust on a shelf?

Where did we go wrong, did we really change that much?

Can we start again please; turn over a new page and such

I’m sorry that I lied and the truth will break us now

Someday we’ll be together again, I don’t know where or how

I feel like I am damaged, Joe. I’m missing a piece of my heart

Can we begin again please, can we go back to the start?

 

“The Defeatist” will be FREE on Amazon on 24/7/15 (tomorrow.)
Don’t forget to download your free copy :

UK www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

USA  www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

Canada www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

France http://www.amazon.fr/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

Germany http://www.amazon.de/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

Spain http://www.amazon.es/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

Italy http://www.amazon.it/Defeatist-English-Sophie-Bowns-ebook/dp/B00WEIF1ZK

Australia   http://www.amazon.com.au/Defeatist-Sophie-Bowns-ebook/dp/B00WEIF1ZK

Japan  http://www.amazon.co.jp/Defeatist-English-Sophie-Bowns-ebook/dp/B00WEIF1ZK

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015

More To Life


The Defeatist actual kindle image

“The Defeatist” will be FREE on Amazon on 24/7/15 (Friday.)
Don’t forget to download your free copy here!

More To Life

Joe

Jude, this isn’t right, you’re holding onto the past
It’s time to move on, you have to let go and fast
Forget about your hateful Dad, grow up, and get a grip
You fret about things constantly. You’re going to make me flip
Jude, we have a future, wake up, I’m trying to make you see;
There’s more to life than what you had. Now there’s you and me.

Jude

I can’t move on in a heartbeat, you don’t know what we’ve done
Dad has flown off the handle; he’s going to leave my Mum
Change frightens me Joe; I’m only eighteen years old
Don’t give me a frosty reception. Please don’t be so cold
I know we have a future, but it will take time for me to see;
That there’s more to life than my parents. Now there’s you and me.

(USA link) http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

(UK link) http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

~I’m still  looking for people who’d be willing to review “The Defeatist” on Amazon. If you’re interested, please tweet me at @SE_BownsFiction

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015

I Knew Him Once.


Grace :

I knew him once Henry, but that was a long time ago

Did he have depression? Quite frankly, I don’t know

How well did I know him? Well enough I guess

We were friends then, until his life became a mess

He was a decent guy Henry; don’t judge him by this act

Jude’s death was a horrible tragedy, we can’t deny that fact

I keep seeing him in my dreams, I can’t rest at night;

Every time I close my eyes, he’s there, within my sight.

My novel, “The Defeatist” is just £1 on Amazon :

The Defeatist actual kindle image

(USA link) http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

(UK link) http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

~I’m still  looking for people who’d be willing to review “The Defeatist” on Amazon. If you’re interested, please tweet me at @SE_BownsFiction

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015

The Witness


defeatist car

Grace :

Oh God! I saw it all, I watched a man die

The car completely shattered in the blink of an eye

I didn’t  know what to do, the situation was too bizarre

I stood like a coward, when I should have pulled him from his car

Do you know who he was, or why he was out so late?

Why did he make me see it, was it all a terrible mistake?

I glanced at his damaged face; his body was a broken mess

Do you think he died quickly or did he suffer in distress?

Oh God, I observed everything. I’m numb, I can’t yet cry

What had this poor soul been through to make him want to die?

An extract from chapter 1

“This is Grace Winters.”
Oh shit. I feel guilty; it can’t have been pleasant to watch. She sniffs and wipes her eyes with a tissue.
“I-I don’t know Jude personally now, but I knew of him and saw him out and about.” My eyes widen.
“Could you tell us what happened?”
“He’s dead, isn’t he?”
They’re reluctant to tell her, my family don’t even know yet. They cannot get hold of my Mum, she’s abroad.
“The accident was fatal.”
“I know. I saw it all.”
“Start at the beginning.”
She leans forward and runs a hand through her shoulder length hair as another tear falls down her cheek. Grace adjusts her dressing gown. This is all too horrible.
“I was getting ready for bed. I just happened to go over to my curtains to draw them when I heard a car screeching, it skidded. He-he must have been going at some speed when he hit the tree; I saw the tree branch go right through the guy’s windscreen. I was terrified, but I rang an ambulance right away, I-I wanted to pull him out of the car, but it had crumpled so much that….”
“You did the right thing.”
“Did I? He’s dead; perhaps I should have gone with my instincts and tried.”

My novel, “The Defeatist” is just £1 on Amazon :

The Defeatist actual kindle image

(USA link) http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

(UK link) http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00WEIF1ZK

~I’m currently looking for people who’d be willing to review “The Defeatist” on Amazon. If you’re interested, please tweet me at @SE_BownsFiction

©Sophie Bowns 2011-2015